Project Fail

I've had quite a few stinkers in my day. The first (and only) bolero I tried to make for myself wouldn't fit a toddler, I've got a half finished cardigan that looks more like a rug, and today I tried to make stash-busting coasters for our coffee table. Tried. Failed. It looks like a box of Crayolas exploded. For every nice thing that I make, I've probably got ten or twelve (or more) stinkers waiting to be frogged.

Those few nice projects give me hope. I know I can make nice things. I just have to struggle for it. The struggle is good, though, even if it feels terrible at the time. In every horrible project hides a lesson, even if that lesson is that you can't make those colors work together, or that you really should check the gauge more carefully. Or, sometimes, the lesson is simply that not everything that looks nice on the model in the picture will look good on you. As for people who don't struggle, well, I've also learned it is okay to despise them. It's okay though. People like that don't really exist anyway.

Recommended reading: Bird by Bird, by Annie Lamott. True, it's about writing, but the same wit and wisdom goes for any craft that breeds frustration.

Happy Okapi

These are one of my favorite animals! They look like some kind of zebra-horse hybrid, but they are really closer to giraffes. The legs on this pattern use a technique of working in spirals that seems scary at first, but is really simple and quick once you get the hang of it.

Body
Make the basic body.

Legs (make 4)
Rnd 1: starting in black, ch 2. 6 sc in 2nd ch from hook. (6 st)
Rnd 2: work in a spiral. Sc 6 times. (6 st)
This is where things get fun. take your hook out of the black yarn. Use a stitch marker (I recommend paper clips) and place it in the loop to hold the stitch in place.
Rnd 3: in next st, join white. Ch 1. Sc 6 times (the last stitch will go into the held stitch). (6 st)
Rnd 4: remove marker from black yarn, and place it in white yarn. Using the black yarn, 6 sc (in the white stitches). (6 st)
Rnd 5: remove marker from white yarn, and place it in black yarn. Using the white yarn, 6 sc (in the black stitches). (6 st)
Rnd 6: repeat Rnd 4 (black). (6 st)
Rnd 7: repeat Rnd 5 (white), but sc 3 times. Sl 1, and fasten. Leave some tail for sewing.
Rnd 8: (black) sl 1, fasten.

Head
Rnd 1: starting in black, ch 2. 6 sc in 2nd ch from hook. (6 st)
Rnd 2: work in a spiral. *sc, sc inc. Repeat from * 2 more times (9 st) Sl 1, fasten.
Rnd 3: join white into sl st, ch 1 (counts as first sc). Sc 8 more times. (9 st)
Rnd 4-5: Sc. (9 st per rnd). Sl 1, fasten.
Rnd 6: join brown, ch 1 (counts as first sc). Sc, sc inc, *2 sc, sc inc. Repeat from * 1 more time. (12 st)
Rnd 7: *3 sc, sc inc. Repeat from * 2 more times. (15 st)
Rnd 8-9: sc. (15 st per rnd)
Rnd 10: *3 sc, sc dec. Repeat from * 2 more times. (12 st)
Rnd 11: 6 sc dec. (6 st)
Fasten, leaving a tail for sewing.

Neck
Ch 10, join in first ch.
Rnd 1: sc. (10 st) Work in a spiral.
Rnd 2-3: sc. (10 st)
Rnd 4: 4 sc, 2 sc inc, 4 sc. (12 st)
Rnd 5: 5 sc, 2 sc inc, 5 sc. (14 st)
Rnd 6: 6 sc, 2 sc inc, 6 sc. (16 st) Sl 1, fasten. Leave some tail for sewing.
The increases form the front of the neck.

Ears (make 2)
ch 5. Starting in 2nd ch from hook, sl 1, hdc, tr, hdc. Fasten off.

Bike Helmet Ear Warmers

Brr! Biking in winter needs some special gear. You usually can't wear hats under a bike helmet, and cold ears are a pain in the...ear. I've seen some patterns for similar things around, but they are all knit. I tried making some, but I think my aluminum dpns were covered in grease or something because I would just settle in to a row and all of a sudden I'd feel the plunk of a dpn falling out of all of the stitches and onto my lap.

After turning those dpns into pointed projectiles, I pulled out a crochet hook. Here's what I came up with:

Ear Warmers (Make 2)
Change colors as you wish. Since gauge is a little bit important here, go with 4 dc per inch.
Rnd 1: ch 12. join into first ch, ch 1. Sc into each ch. Join. (6 st)
Rnd 2: ch 3 (counts as first dc). 11 dc. Join. (12 st)
Rnd 3: ch 3. dc in same st. Dc inc, 4 dc, 2 dc inc, 4 dc. Join. (16 st)
Rnd 4: ch 3. 2 dc inc, 6 dc, 2 dc inc, 5 dc. Join. (20 st)
Rnd 5: ch 3. dc, 2 dc inc, 8 dc, 2 dc inc, 6 dc. Join. (24 st)
Rnd 6: ch 3. 2 dc, 2 dc inc, 10 dc, 2 dc inc, 7 dc. Join. (28 st)
Rnd 7: ch 3. 3 dc, 2 dc inc, 12 dc, 2 dc inc, 8 dc. Join. (32 st)
Rnd 8: ch 3. 4 dc, 2 dc inc, 14 dc, 2 dc inc, 9 dc. Join. (36 st)
Rnd 9: ch 4. 2 dc, 2 hdc, sc, 2 sc inc, sc, 2 hdc, 2 dc, 6 tr, 2 dc, 2 hdc, sc, 2 sc inc, sc, 2 hdc, 2 dc, 5 tr. Join. (40 st)
Rnd 10: ch 1. 18 sc, ch 4. starting in next st, 22 sc. Join, fasten off.
Make 2 monk's cords and thread them through the back of each ear warmer at the top center. This will make ties that you can use to attach to your helmet. After securing, thread one end through the front loop and tie the two ends together.

If you need extra rows, or if you don't feel like counting your stitches, make your increases into the 2 center stitches of the increases below. Dc everywhere else.

Happy (warm) riding!

Basic Body

This makes makes a pretty nice sphere. One thing I learned from physics is that it's okay to assume the cow is spherical, so I went ahead and applied that to pretty much all animals. This is, therefore, a great base for almost any animal.

The basic body is spherical, but it can also be stretched and modified very easily. The "Itty Bitty Elephant" pattern uses the basic body exactly, but the "Sleepy Sheep" pattern has the decreases spaced out by rows of single crochet for a longer body.

You could just use it as a toy ball, but I'd be a bit squeamish about throwing around an animal torso. If that's your thing, though...

Basic Body
Rnd 1: ch 2. In 2nd ch from hook, 6 sc. (6 st)
Rnd 2: working in a spiral, 6 sc inc. (12 st)
Rnd 3: *sc, sc inc. Repeat from * 5 more times. (18 st)
Rnd 4: *2 sc, sc inc. Repeat from * 5 more times. (24 st)
Rnd 5: *5 sc, sc inc. Repeat from * 3 more times. (28 st)
Rnd 6: *6 sc, sc inc. Repeat from * 3 more times. (32 st)
Rnd 7-9: sc. (32 st per rnd)
Rnd 10: *6 sc, sc dec. Repeat from * 3 more times. (28 st)
Rnd 11: *5 sc, sc dec. Repeat from * 3 more times. (24 st)
Rnd 12: *2 sc, sc dec. Repeat from * 5 more times. (18 st)
Rnd 13: *sc, sc dec. Repeat from * 5 more times. (12 st)
Rnd 14: *sc dec. Repeat from * 5 more times. (6 st)
Fasten off. Stuff it and sew shut.

Sleepy Sheep

This pattern requires a few basic crochet skills: sc, hdc, sc inc, sc dec, sl, working in rounds, and basic sewing. Gauge does not matter.

Body (in white)
Rnd 1: ch 2, 6 sc in 2nd ch from hook. (6 st)
Rnd 2: working in a spiral, 6 sc inc. (12 st)
Rnd 3: *sc, sc inc. Repeat from * 5 more times. (18 st)
Rnd 4: *2 sc, sc inc. Repeat from * 5 more times. (24 st)
Rnd 5: *5 sc, sc inc. Repeat from * 3 more times. (28 st)
Rnd 6: *6 sc, sc inc. Repeat from * 3 more times. (32 st)
Rnd 7-9: sc. (32 st per rnd)
Rnd 10: *6 sc, sc dec. Repeat from * 3 more times. (28 st)
Rnd 11: sc. (28 st)
Rnd 12: *5 sc, sc dec. Repeat from * 3 more times. (24 st)
Rnd 13: sc. (24 st)
Rnd 14: *2 sc, sc dec. Repeat from * 5 more times. (18 st)
Rnd 15: sc. (18 st)
Rnd 16: *sc, sc dec. Repeat from * 5 more times. (12 st)
Rnd 17: sc. (12 st)
Rnd 18: sc dec 6 times. (6 st)
Rnd 19: sc. (6 st)
Sl 1. Fasten, with a tail long enough for sewing.

Head (start in gray)
Rnd 1: ch 2, 6 sc in 2nd ch from hook. (6 st)
Rnd 2: working in a spiral, sc inc 6 times. (12 st)
Rnd 3: *sc, sc inc. Repeat from * 5 more times. (18 st)
Sl 1, fatsen off. Join white to sl st and ch 1.
Rnd 4: 4 sc, sc inc, *5 sc, sc inc. Repeat from * 1 more time. (21 st)
Rnd 5-7: sc. (21 st per rnd)
Rnd 8: *5 sc, sc dec. Repeat from * 2 more times. (18 st)
Rnd 9: *sc, sc dec. Repeat from * 5 more times. (12 st)
Rnd 10: sc dec 6 times. (6 st)
Fasten, with a tail long enough for sewing. Stuff the head and sew closed the remaining hole.
Nose (in gray)
Rnd 1: ch 2, 6 sc in 2nd ch from hook. (6 st)
Rnd 2: working in a spiral, sc inc 6 times. (12 st)
Rnd 3: sc (12 st)
Sl 1. Fasten, with a tail long enough for sewing. Stuff it and sew it to the head below the center of the face.

Legs (make 4, start in gray)
Rnd 1: ch 2, 6 sc in 2nd ch from hook. (6 st)
Rnd 2-4: sc. (6 st per rnd)
Sl 1, fatsen off. Join white to sl st and ch 1.
Rnd 5: sc inc, *sc, sc inc. Repeat from * 1 more time. (9 st)
Rnd 6-7: sc. (9 st per rnd)

Tail (in white)
Rnd 1: ch 2, 4 sc in 2nd ch from hook. (4 st)
Rnd 2: *sc, sc inc. Repeat from * 1 more time. (6 st)
Rnd 3: 3 sc, 3 hdc.
Sl 1, fasten off.

Ears (make 2, in gray)
Row 1: Ch 4. Starting in 2nd ch from hook, 3 sc. Fasten off.

A Brief History of Knitting and Me

Knitting is new to me. Well, not exactly. I kinda sorta picked it up when I was about eight or so, but not really. I stopped so I could play with a Skip-It or Sit 'n' Spin instead. They don't make those for grown ups, do they? No? What a shame. I think I tried knitting a little bit as a teen, but never got further than a cast on. I bent the needle and broke the yarn, so whatever I did, it certainly wasn't knitting.

Fast forward to...well...lately. I've learned to crochet, which is awesome to no bounds. It's very free-form, which means I can make things up as I go. This means that sometimes I end up with something way cooler than what I envisioned. Oh, and if I make a mistake, I can just carelessly rip out those stitches and try again.

Then knitting came around. I don't really know why I started. Maybe I thought that since all my friends are doing it, I should too. Probably not, but it did give me a bunch of people I could go to for help when I was frustrated enough to throw my needles across the room. Really, I probably started because I wanted to make nice things to wear. Crochet hats are nice, and scarves, but crochet socks are too bulky to wear with shoes and as far as sweaters go, well, let's just say I don't need any help to look chubby. That's not to say there aren't lovely crochet sweater patterns out there, but hey. I'm a curvy girl, and I need some stretch in my wearables.

And thusly I began to knit, and it was not good. Not at first anyway. But I kept at it, and completed a few really small projects. First a wrist warmer (single, just the one, and I never wore it), two hats knitted on flat needles (which I wear regularly), and a basic garter stitch scarf (from which I am nigh inseparable). My knitting is much better now. I'm working on a pair of socks now that will probably be finished by Christmas (of 2010, if I work nonstop). I'm happy with it. I've learned.

I still get frustrated and throw needles, but now the ones I throw are dpns and probably made of bamboo, not aluminum. Then I pick up one of my crochet projects and let the knitting frustration melt away.

Itty Bitty Elephant

Itty Bitty Elephant

My first pattern! This is a free pattern, but please do not sell the pattern as yours or sell an army of small elephants without my permission.

This pattern requires a few basic crochet skills: sc, hdc, sc inc, sc dec, sl, working in rounds, and basic sewing. Gauge does not matter.

Body
Rnd 1: ch 2. 6 sc in first ch. (6 st)
Rnd 2: working in a spiral, sc inc 6 times. (12 st)
Rnd 3: *sc, sc inc. Repeat from * 5 more times. (18 st)
Rnd 4: *2 sc, sc inc. Repeat from * 5 more times. (24 st)
Rnd 5: *5 sc, sc inc. Repeat from * 3 more times. (28 st)
Rnd 6: *6 sc, sc inc. Repeat from * 3 more times. (32 st)
Rnd 7-9: sc. (32 st per rnd)
Rnd 10: *6 sc, sc dec. Repeat from * 3 more times. (28 st)
Rnd 11: *5 sc, sc dec. Repeat from * 3 more times. (24 st)
Rnd 12: *2 sc, sc dec. Repeat from * 5 more times. (18 st)
Rnd 13: *sc, sc dec. Repeat from * 5 more times. (12 st)
Rnd 14: sc dec 6 times. Fasten, with a tail long enough for sewing.
Stuff the body and sew closed the remaining hole.

Head
Rnd 1: ch 20. Join to first ch. Sc in each ch. (20 st)
Rnd 2: working in a spiral, 20 sc. (20 st)
Rnd 3: 4 sc dec, 10 sc, sc dec. (15 st)
Rnd 4: 3 sc dec, 9 sc. (12 st)
Rnd 5: 12 sc. (12 st)
Rnd 6: 2 sc dec, 8 sc. (10 st)
Rnd 7-10: 10 sc. (10 st per rnd)
Rnd 11: 1 sc dec, 2 sc, 1 sc dec, 4 hdc. (8 st)
Rnd 12: 4 sc, 4 hdc. (8 st)
Rnd 13: 2 sc dec, sc, 2 hdc, sc. (6 st)
Rnd 14-16: sc. (6 st per rnd)
Sl, then fasten off. Stuff it and sew it to the body. The top of the head should be about one stitch away from the top center of the body.

Legs (make 4)
Rnd 1: ch 2. 6 sc in first ch. (6 st)
Rnd 2: working in a spiral, sc inc 6 times. (12 st)
Rnd 3-5: sc (12 st per rnd)
Sl, then fasten off. Stuff them and sew them to the body.

Ears (make 2)
Row 1: ch 5. Sc in next 4 ch from hook. Ch 1, turn. (4 st)
Row 2: sc inc, 2 sc, sc inc. Ch 1, turn. (6 st)
Row 3: sc inc, 4 sc, sc inc. Ch 1, turn. (8 sc)
Row 4: *sc, ch 3. Repeat from * 6 more times. Sc. (8 st)
Fasten off. Sew on the seam where the head meets the body.

Tusks (optional, make 2)
Row 1: ch 4. starting in 2nd ch from hook, sl, sc, hdc. (3 st(
Fasten off. Sew them on the head.

Tail
Row 1: With 2 strands held tog, ch 4.
Fasten off. Sew to the body.